In Iran it is illegal for women to be in public without having their head covered (usually by a headscarf or chador (full robe with face showing). Muslim/non-muslim relationships are punishable by death. I had been approached by local males who respectfully asked me not to take a photo when there was a group of schoolgirls (all in full chador) in the background of the shot.
So when Brad and I were walking home form dinner in Yazd (an isolated desert city of 500,000 people) and a looked into what seemed an empty meeting hall, and had a man come onto the street and insist that we come inside and sit down among at least 20 women - many with their hair out and chadors off - we were a little non-plussed. A lady with excellent English came and sat with us, explaining that a women’s prayer meeting had just finished, and all these girls were extended family (they are allowed to be uncovered in private, and the only male was their Father who had pulled us in off the street). As we sat talking with the lady, her father, sisters and cousins started delivering plates of food, cups of tea, and more plates of sweets to us, each of them welcoming us to Iran with a kind smile.
Aside from the second dinner and further enlightenment to the curious fine print of Islamic and Persian conventions, the really enjoyable part was the family atmosphere. We were a part of a family gathering of over 20 people, all of whom were sitting around and just enjoying each other’s company, and we felt like the guests of honour. These meetings happen a number of times a week, and it seems that for all the restrictions in Iranian life, a huge plus is how close the families here are. Before leaving NZ I lived with my grandparents for a month or so and thoroughly enjoyed every bit, just as I do being at family gatherings, but as the lady said to us, “Westerners are much busier, and so don’t have time for family”. Iranians make it clear that they are envious of people in foreign countries who can wear what they want, say what they want, and do what they want, but we made it clear to our hosts that night how we envy and admire the Iranian pace of life and culture of family. Brad and I have since been discussing: how much of this culture would be kept if the floodgates of personal freedom were thrown open?
Not sure if it would impact that much on the family culture. Look at Maori, Indian and Asian cultures which have been heavily influenced by western ideas. They still maintain very close knit extended family units, often with several generations living under the same roof. People often scoff at asian people living with their parents and sometimes uncles, aunties and grandparents, even after they're married, but it's simply a cultural thing and is not seen to be weird at all (of course it's more common in say HK than NZ). So I reckon Iranian families would continue to have strong family ties. Pretty sure there would be many Iranian families living in NZ who could attest to that? Anyhoo that's my 2 cents :) Loving the posts, keep em coming!
ReplyDelete